Age 19

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In honor of Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month 2010

Upon My Devotion

Upon my devotion
you spread your anger
with the world
I now suffer

You thought you were safe
or perhaps you thought
I wouldn’t stop kidding myself

Memories well up
your ice-green eyes bulging
your once soft hands
twisting
shoving
pinning my body…my mind

Close to three years fear bound me to you
Fear of being alone, fearing of losing
all I have invested in “US”

Close to three years I was the butt
of your anger
-my instinct was first to protect you-
I believed in your promises

My belief has deteriorated
and an even greater fear
has pulled me away

Losing sight of myself
I always put you first

I leave you yes
but that is a far less sacrifice
then leaving myself
I am not capable of being
responsible for you and me both

This time…
I choose me
Forever

-Elin Stebbins-age 19